(no subject)

[haveyourmoments]

Every day I wake up in my palatial bed with a renewed sense of regret, wishing that there had been any other way to save Alderaan other than agreeing to marry Isolder, my now husband, the Prince of Hapan. There’s nothing wrong with him, exactly, he’s polite and proper and beautiful, of course, with his long blonde hair and blue-gray eyes. He’s kind, and patient with me and never fails to forgive my temper, but somehow that oboe makes it worse, makes me feel like an unruly child instead of his wife, his equal.

He tells me that he’s selected a new pilot for my flagship, that this stranger will be my bodyguard as well due to the ongoing threats in my life and I do my best not to sulk, knowing I’m capable of taking care of myself, but instead nodding and accepting his unassuming kiss on my cheek.

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[haveyourmoments]

“I’m so scared you’re going to change your mind,” I whisper.

[going_solo]

“Why on Earth would I do that?” I ask, bewildered. “I’m… addicted to you.”

[haveyourmoments]

“You’re…” I frown, not because I’m upset with him, but because I’m trying to figure out what the hell I missed. “You mean like, romantically?”

[going_solo]

“I mean, maybe addicted was the wrong word…” I say, starting to panic.

[haveyourmoments]

“No, no, what you said was fine! Sweet, even,” I insist quickly, seeing the look of panic on his face. I reach for his hand and thread our fingers together. “I need to hear things like that.”

[going_solo]

"Yeah?" I ask, relaxing a little, grateful that she's not put off. "I can... whatever you need, I'm here."

[haveyourmoments]

“I don’t even know half of what I need,” I tell him softly. “I’ve never…he was my only experience with a romantic relationship.”

[going_solo]

"And not a great one at that," I say. "But I will keep you safe, and happy, and... let you be you."

[haveyourmoments]

“Can’t be much better than that,” I murmur softly. I kiss his cheek and then burrow against his side, my nose pressed against his neck in the hopes of surrounding myself with him.

[youronlyho]

"You're safe with me," I say, a promise. "I'm going to treat you right."

[haveyourmoments]

“I know,” I murmur softly. “I feel safe with you.”

[going_solo]

“And you are,” I say, kissing her cheek. “Thank you for trusting me.”

[haveyourmoments]

I blush softly, turning my head enough to rub my nose against his. “Can we stay like this forever?”

[going_solo]

“I mean, at some point Chewie will come looking for us…” I tease, planting a kiss to her forehead.

[haveyourmoments]

“Oh god,” I laugh, burying my face in his neck. “What is he going to think?!”

[going_solo]

“Pure jealousy, obviously. The question is just who he’ll be more jealous of.”

[haveyourmoments]

“You’re ridiculous!” I say, swatting him as I laugh, then immediately freezing in terror. “I - I didn’t mean to - “

[going_solo]

"Didn't mean to what?" I ask, genuinely baffled.

[haveyourmoments]

“I hit you!” I barely manage to get the words out, shaking so violently I think I might throw up. “I’m so sorry!”

[going_solo]

“What are you talking about?!” I ask, the only thing I can recall being a playful tap. “Relax, Leia. I told you, you’re safe.”

[haveyourmoments]

“I…I’m sorry,” I say softly, my voice barely above a whisper as I look down at my hands, embarrassed.

[going_solo]

"What happened?" I ask gently. "You can tell me."

[haveyourmoments]

“I just…I hit him once, just once on accident, I swear! But he got so angry at me…”

[going_solo]

"Leia, please, relax. I'm not him. I'm never going to hurt you, or get mad at you."

[haveyourmoments]

“I know that,” I tell him. “But I had a flash back.”