(no subject)

[haveyourmoments]

Every day I wake up in my palatial bed with a renewed sense of regret, wishing that there had been any other way to save Alderaan other than agreeing to marry Isolder, my now husband, the Prince of Hapan. There’s nothing wrong with him, exactly, he’s polite and proper and beautiful, of course, with his long blonde hair and blue-gray eyes. He’s kind, and patient with me and never fails to forgive my temper, but somehow that oboe makes it worse, makes me feel like an unruly child instead of his wife, his equal.

He tells me that he’s selected a new pilot for my flagship, that this stranger will be my bodyguard as well due to the ongoing threats in my life and I do my best not to sulk, knowing I’m capable of taking care of myself, but instead nodding and accepting his unassuming kiss on my cheek.

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[going_solo]

I stroke her back in circles, with a proud grin on my face as I do.

[haveyourmoments]

“You seem happy,” I muse softly, pulling back just enough to trace the lines of his face with my fingertips, memorizing the way he looks in this moment.

[going_solo]

"I think I might just be," I say, relishing her touch. "It's not something I'm used to."

[haveyourmoments]

“Me either,” I murmur, touching the crinkles in the corner of his eye. “Maybe we can find happiness together.”

[going_solo]

“I like the sound of that,” I say, stroking her cheek.

[haveyourmoments]

I smile softly, leaning into his touch sleepily. “I think you wore me out.”

[going_solo]

“Is it wrong if that makes me proud?”

[haveyourmoments]

“No,” i say, blushing. “I think you’ve earned it.”

[going_solo]

“Mind if I earn it again and again?” I ask.

[haveyourmoments]

“Hmm,” I murmur softly, pretending to consider his suggestion. “I’ll take it under advisement.”

[going_solo]

“I would be honoured if you did,” I grin.

[haveyourmoments]

“Go to sleep!” I say , laughing, slipping my leg in between his.

[going_solo]

“You’re telling me you’re not up for round two?” I tease, even though I’m spent.

[haveyourmoments]

“Maybe in the morning,” I say tiredly, burying my face in his neck.

[going_solo]

“Get some rest, Princess,” I say, planting a kiss atop her head.

[haveyourmoments]

We spend blissful weeks in and out of hyperspace, landing only briefly to restock for supplies a few times on our way to a hideout on Chewie’s home planet of Kashyyk. It’s our last stop before we arrive, and I’m browsing in a market, Han just out of my sight when I’m violently grabbed from behind, my mouth covered as I try to kick and scream.

[going_solo]

I'm clueless to what's happened at first, until I hear Chewie groaning and then I realize. I immediately give chase in the direction he points, calling after Leia.

[haveyourmoments]

“Han!” I manage to yell desperately after biting my captor's hand, but he grabs his blaster and stuns me, and I collapse on the spot before I’m carried away into an unfamiliar ship.

[going_solo]

We immediately get onto the Falcon, headed in the direction he insists he saw Leia go. I’m shaking the entire time, scared in ways I’ll never admit.

[haveyourmoments]

The strangers start take me back to Hapes, my wrists bound, and then Isolder makes his appearance. He looms over me wordlessly, long moments of silence before he lunges forward, hitting me so hard I fall to the floor before he hauls me back up, throwing me unceremoniously onto the bed and starting to tear off my clothes.

[going_solo]

I don’t know what’s happening, but I know it can’t be good. Despite the literal space between us, the metal and glass, I find myself yelling: “Leia!”

[haveyourmoments]

It’s so much worse than all the times before; not just because I know without a doubt of his cruel intentions, but because I know what it’s like to be cared for now. I don’t mean to cry, but I can’t help it, biting my lip to keep from calling for Han, terrified.

[going_solo]

His ship is better, faster than ours but I’m smarter than him and so eventually we’re on its tail, Chewie taking control while I go to the bathroom to be sick.

[haveyourmoments]

I get sick as well, begging for Han to materialize as soon as I’m alone. I hear them shouting about a ship following us, and I feel the slightest sliver of hope as we’re forced to make an emergency landing. I curl up, shivering, and wonder if there’s any chance that Han can actually get on this ship and save me.

[going_solo]

The emergency of the landing almost kills us, but we manage it, and I climb off the ship with my blaster in hand.